Sacrifice Of Praise

“My gaze transfixed on Jesus face…..Oh Praise the Name of the Lord our God, Oh Praise His Name forevermore, for endless days we will sing His Praise, Oh Lord, Oh Lord our God”

We were singing in worship on that particular Sunday when God used the words from this song to give me a glimpse of what Josiah gets to experience for eternity.

It’s in these worship moments that I feel the very closest to my boy. Like I’m joining with him and we’re praising God together.

As most know, Josiah died from a blood clot that went to his lung. We watched helplessly as he struggled to breathe and then finally took his last breath. I can close my eyes and go back to that day like it was yesterday.

I knew in those seconds that followed, my sweet Josiah was getting the introduction of a lifetime. He was being ushered into his face-to-face meeting with his Savior, Jesus Christ.

As calmly as I make all of this sound now, I wasn’t on that December day. I wanted my boy to live and celebrate Christmas with us. I wanted the EMS workers to take me seriously when I franticly told them to get inside because my son was not breathing.

It’s just in the crying out to God to try to understand and make any sense of all of this that He allowed me to see, from His perspective, the Joy that awaited Josiah.

Sing His Praises

I LOVE OUR WORSHIP AT CHURCH! I have always enjoyed a more contemporary worship style. The songs we sing and the freedom to raise my hands to God. Worship through singing His praises is a weapon destroyer against the enemy because it silences him.

In the weeks following Josiah’s death, I would lock myself in the bathroom and turn up the music. With tears streaming down my face, the devil needed to be reminded that even though he gained a little territory, we still win the war.

When It Hurts

When my children were toddlers, music was a big investment. VHS, cassette tapes, and a little later, CD’s and DVD’s.

Father Abraham, Deep and Wide, This Little Light of Mine, He’s Got the Whole World in His Hands……Come on, I KNOW you can’t see these titles without humming the tune and doing the hand motions.

Remember Veggie Tales and The Donut Man? I sure do!!

Clap along to “We bring the sacrifice of praise unto the house of the Lord.” What does that even mean?

Sacrifice and Praise seem like opposite things.

Sacrifice is something that requires all I’ve got within me to accomplish. Something that costs something. Something I DO NOT FEEL LIKE DOING!

Praise, on the other hand, is usually from joyful heart. Something easy to do. When our grandchildren do well in their activities. When our dog deserves a treat. When God answers a prayer the way we hoped. I FEEL LIKE DOING THIS!

Spiritually, these two words are intertwined. How do we praise when our circumstances aren’t joyful? When you think you’ve prayed your prayers on “Opposite Day?” When you can’t even find the words to utter a prayer at all?

God says to CONTINUALLY do it!

That’s where the sacrifice comes in. I must go against my will and feelings to declare that “GOD IS STILL GOOD!” In my own sacrifice, I’m screaming to the enemy, “Even though I don’t yet see or understand, I’m believing that God will do what He says He’ll do and that He’ll be Who He says He’ll be!!”

Anyone can praise Him in the sunshine, but praising Him when we’re knee-deep in the muck and mire of grief brings honor to Him from a humble heart. As Mom’s on this journey, our heart’s have been and continue to be refined by fire in the absence of our children.

We choose to honor God when we don’t FEEL like singing, but do it anyway. It’s believing that He will give us a glimpse into the Glory and Joy that awaits us, when our hearts will be complete again.

That’s what the Sacrifice of Praise means to me. And hopefully, you too.

My Prayer For You

“Lord, we base our praise on Who You are, not on our opinions or feelings. It’s hard going against what our will wants to do in tumultuous times. I believe it will give us a picture of the joy that awaits us with our children that have gone ahead of us. We bring the sacrifice of praise into Your house. I like to think it will be hand delivered to the one’s we miss the most. In Jesus’ Name”